" I'm too old to look
for a new relationship "
When to use: When you'd rather settle
than forge ahead
When not to use: To talk yourself out of
dating. If you don't want to date, don't. Why
bother wasting an excellent justification on a
reason to reduce self-inflicted torture?
Comments: The truly excellent bit of this justification is
that it is so deceptively convincing. There is,
after all, a correct timeline for being in a
serious relationship, right? It's supposed to
come at a particular point in one's life, either
while you are still young, or if divorced or
widowed, within a short period following. Right?
Well....no, actually. That correct timeline is
just an idea. It's a thought in your head. And
it's an example of how your thoughts not only
mislead; they can hurt you, too.
Settling isn't a bad thing. If you've lived a
full life, partied to your soul's content, and
experienced a thousand splendid
something-or-others, then by all means, settle.
There are good reasons to settle, after all. And
yet, there are bad reasons, and those are
usually based in fear. And if that's where
you're at, then here's what's in store should
you settle: a vague uneasiness will plague your
days. You will feel incomplete, harrassed by the
ordinary chores of life, and precious few
moments will taste sweet. Morning will be worse,
for in those moments shortly after you've awoke,
that uneasiness will morph into abject distress,
taunting you about your wasted life. Sound
awful. It should. You've turned your back on
your ambition, marginalized your self-worth, and
virtually abandoned your potential. How else
should you feel?
If this is where you're at, you can always do
something about it, such as recognize it's an
irrational fear, accept it as part of who you
are, and devise a plan for not being taken in by
it. But let's face it, you're a self-deceiver.
And self-deceivers never face anything they can
justify their way out of ;-)
" You can't have too much
of something so long as you collect it "
When to use: No. The question is “When not to use?”
When not to use: Never
Comments: Needing a way to justify your greed? Look no further. Anything can be
collected: Money, clothes, shoes, gold and exercise machines, as well as
experiences like sex, drugs, and grand larceny. I'm sure you've got a few of
your own to add.
Whatever is your vice, collecting transmutes it from Vice to Hobby. Why
shouldn’t sex be a hobby? Better a hobby than an obsession. Obsessions are too
time-consuming, after all.
But what if the collection you amass reaches the proportions of Imelda Marcos’s
shoe collection and people look upon you with a mixture of amazement and
disgust? No worries; just use another justification: “I don’t like them anyway.”